Restricted

Restricted
I am not sure when the transition happened
Yesterday I was holding handlebars
Eating chocolate cake
Wiping the blood from my small knee wound
And now I am here
Dedicated to sitting
And waiting for something to happen
Checking Facebook, Youtube, updates on the Bay
And my young heart is jumping for 5pm
Jumping to dance in this cubical
To feel the soft carpet underneath my toes
To find a companion to play
It was only yesterday that I was watching the latest shows
Eating organic fruit smoothies and watching my weight
Complaining period cramps for PE class
And ditching school to rush to taco bell
Peter was with me, we made love, and I cried
It was only yesterday when emotions could grapple me
And now I am here 4:32
It is silent
Near Christmas time
My studio sits bare and cold
The yogurt is covered with pizza and my bank account is sad
Peter has a wife
And Todd hasn’t called
I spent my last hope on my student loans
And now it’s 4:52